How to Heal Yourself and Find Your Purpose in Life

Learning how to heal yourself and find your purpose in life can be a slow process but a thoroughly worthwhile one. You don’t need to rise just yet. Sometimes, the bravest thing you can do is let yourself fall.

Maybe your business collapsed. Maybe your relationship ended in betrayal or violence. Maybe you became a mother and suddenly couldn’t recognize the woman staring back in the mirror. Maybe, like so many of us, your life cracked open in too many places at once—and you haven’t had time to breathe, let alone heal. We recommend this book for helping you to understand the pain and trauma you keep bottled up and this book is great for letting it all out.

This is Part 1 of our Rebuild Your Life, Reinvent Yourself series. In this 8 part series, we’re exploring a topic that many women experience at some point in her life – losing and rediscovering your identity. There are many reasons why you might feel disconnected from your inner voice, your passions, what you really want in life and your goals. So throughout this series, we’re going to help you rebuild your life, rediscover your true identity, and rebirth your most authentic self. It’s time to find the real you again!

This is the rubble. It’s the moment when the old story ends and the new one hasn’t begun. It’s not pretty. It’s not curated. It’s raw, chaotic, lonely, and terrifying.

And yet, if you listen closely, it’s also sacred.

Why Collapse Doesn’t Mean Failure

In a world obsessed with productivity and perfection, collapse looks like failure. But here’s the truth: collapse is often the beginning of an upgrade your soul didn’t ask for, but deeply needed.

You are not broken. You are breaking open. There is a difference.

The systems, relationships, patterns, and masks that once kept you afloat have stopped working—not because you failed, but because you’re evolving. The rubble is what remains when your life says, “Not this. Not anymore.”

The Grief We Don’t Talk About

Rebirth begins in grief. Not just grief for people or jobs or cities you’ve lost, but for the version of you who didn’t survive this chapter. The part of you who believed in certain dreams. The woman who trusted certain people. The girl who thought life would go differently.

She deserves to be mourned.

Let yourself cry. Write her a letter. Say goodbye with love. She carried you as far as she could. And now, a new version of you is waiting to emerge—but not until you honor what’s been.

Permission to Pause

If you’re in the rubble, you don’t need a plan yet. You need presence. You need softness. You need permission to:

Sleep longer
Speak less
Feel everything
Ask for help
Create without a deadline
Not know what comes next
This is the pause before the rebuild. It’s where the foundation is cleared, where your body recalibrates, where your heart whispers, “We’re still here.”

A Gentle Invitation

You don’t need to do anything today. But if you want to begin, just begin with truth.

Ask yourself:

What am I still grieving?
What did I hope for that didn’t happen?
What have I been too afraid to say out loud?
What do I want to let go of, even if it still hurts?
Write it down. Burn it. Bury it. Cry over it. Scream into a pillow. Sit with it under the stars. There is no wrong way to begin again, only honest ones.

How to Focus on Yourself

Women are generally guilty of not focusing on themselves or giving themselves enough time, care and attention. But here’s your sign to take a break and focus on yourself in order to live a purpose driven life and upgrade your life. This is not the end. It is the sacred middle. The becoming-before-the-becoming. The inhale before the rise.

Let the rubble be holy. Let the breakdown be the birthplace. Let yourself fall.

The rebirth begins here.